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When U r in Love with a Beautiful Man

***Note: The definition and description of love has changed for me over the years. Not once but multiple times. As I’ve aged, matured and all that, love has changed its meaning too. Today if I had to describe it, I’d have a very different description. But looking at how I saw it then in 2000, makes me smile at my naivety. :D***

Of secret rendezvous, love notes, lovers’ tiffs, first base and other telltale signs of love

When u start feeling contented, everything looks rosy and pink, u feel u can never lose, u r on that winning streak. When ur friends catch u secretly smiling with no reason whatsoever, and u feel on top of the world… when ur shoulders never droop and u r looking far into the future. When there is a lightness to ur step and u skip when u gotta walk. When u dash to pick up the phone with ur dad looking on in dismay. When ur almost always dreaming and r lost in warm thoughts and ur mom ultimately has to shake u to get ur attention. Boy! Oh Boy! U r in love babe.

Being in love is the most wonderful feeling and knowing someone loves u can bring so much pleasure. There is something very special that u share with someone u have known for so little time; a bond that u share with no one else and if u happen to find ur best friend in that person then there isn’t anything more to say, for u can share and tell him anything u want to cos u know that he will listen and give u advice – not commands. And, the advice is good.

But there aren’t only the highs…
For a lot of times he wants more then u can give, and most of the time your timings clash and he will expect u to fit into his timetable. So u hardly go out, and when u do, u can’t enjoy the outing to the fullest cos u have a constant nagging fear of someone seeing u with him and reporting back to ur parents.

And when u’ve finally got a chance and r looking forward to going out, he drops out at the last minute or just doesn’t show up! (all because u haven’t got the message that he had passed on through other friends…) So u would have waited frantic with worry…got so pissed off cos u would have turned down ur best friend’s treat just to meet him! So the next time u see him, u would expect him to at least to be on his knees with flowers and an ‘I Am Sorry’ card but all that u get is a goddamn phone call and a nonchalant sorry (if u r lucky).

There r those other times also when u r all alone in some resort or club and he wants to go for the home run and u, well, u r happy with first base. So when he tries to make a move on u and says he’s always gonna be around… will go for so-called complete protection, (cos he doesn’t want complications any more than u do!) that it doesn’t matter and u should stop worrying – u end up sulking and pouting just so that he would reluctantly give up. But, strangely u find urself secretly wishing he had tried harder, for u really wouldn’t mind second base!

Worming his way into ur heart!
But of course there are those small things that mean so much. Finding cards and love notes in books and other hiding places makes ur day. His casual dropping by when he is around the neighborhood (or so he says), his remembering ur favorite eat-out, ur favorite dish and drink or how u like ur coffee, can make u feel so nice. The times when he does things ur way though he’d prefer it his way, makes u love him even more.

Above all, there’s joy in just having him around, of knowing that he will always be there for u, the feeling of being cared for and protected, of being loved and treasured. These things bring so much joy and happiness. It is these tiny things with their ups and downs that make what u share so much more special.

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